In Which We Meet Our Wedding Planner

Ghoulia has found us a wedding planner...straight from hell! Introducing Harridan, the aptly named thorn in my side!

Chums, I am facing a rather large issue. A 6'10" fire breathing issue to be exact! My beloved Ghoulia went to a wedding expo catering to the undead last week. She simply cannot see anything but the good in people, which is one of the things I treasure about her. However, this time it has been sorely misplaced!

Ghoulia found Harridan after wandering around confused for an hour or so. Harridan was extremely polite to Ghoulia, and as far as she is concerned manners are a sign of a good person. Ghoulia admitted she did not know what we needed for a wedding, and Harridan, like the "good person" she is, offered to help with all her wedding plans....for a reasonable fee. Ghoulia was tickled with excitement, and booked a meeting with her straight away.

The day arrived and we sat down with Harridan to start planning the details of our upcoming celebration. Of course I recognized her straight away as a heartache demon. Why would a heartache demon choose the profession of a wedding planner?! It simply didn't make sense. But as I would do anything to see my darling smile, I decided to go along with it for now.

I had, and still have, many reservations. Heartache demons have a sole purpose of destroying love whenever they can, so I was not able to wrap my head around why one would be planning weddings, which is a declaration of eternal love. Harridan agreed with everything Ghoulia wished for or showed interest in. As the meeting went on I felt a weight grow on my mind, or more to the point, my bank account! It is rather difficult to get a job when you lack the necessary organs to fit in with your workplace crowd. The money I invested in automobile manufacturing when they were first invented, and coffee plantations I own in the afterlife produce a comfortable income, but these wedding costs were outrageous! How could I say no when the sparkle in my darling's eye got brighter with every trinket Harridan displayed for her?

I am not sure what to think of Harridan yet. Chums, how do I find out what she is up to without upsetting my Ghoulia? For now I think we will wait and see. Hopefully these plans do not spiral out of control! Till next time...Bone Man out......and broke!

In Which We Discover Where the Skullies Live!

Photo Credit: Juhan Sonin

Find out the details on Skull Emporium's social media and communities!

What, exactly, is a skullie?

Chums, while I do not pretend to have all the answers, I believe the definition of a skullie, is someone who bears a deep love of skulls. Their reasons vary, and the way they show this love to the world varies, but the one constant among them all is the love of skulls, and what they represent to them.

It can be difficult living life as a skullie! Society likes to pretend death does not happen, and while skulls have become very mainstream, the deep seated love of skulls is something not everyone is comfortable with. How do skullie's avoid feeling lonely or isolated?

By finding communities and groups of like-minded people! The internet contains a vast number of skullies, and can be found in all sorts of places. As I am partial to my shop keep (she really is a lovely woman, once you convince her to stop hugging you all the time!) I thought I would highlight some of the ways  you can interact with her shop, Skull Emporium. Not to worry! I'll include all the links to these fabulous pages at the end.

Before the launch of this most wonderful contraption...the world wide web...skullies would congregate in person, in local groups to find that social interaction they so wanted. Nowadays, online communities with hundreds of people make that feeling of togetherness much more attainable for people. Of course step one is following my diary blog. I feel that is most important to any skullie's lifestyle! If, however, you are looking for other avenues of togetherness, Skull Emporium has a number of places you can visit.

The Skull Emporium Community Group on Facebook is one avenue. Here, ALL members of the group can contribute, posting interesting pictures of skulls and skeletons, starting discussions and interacting with each other. The group is still small, but this is a great way to get to know other skullies!

Want to know about upcoming events, promotions, or simply have a feel good boost to your day? Skull Emporium can be found on Facebook and Instagram. Daily postings of promotions, inspirational imagery and news can be found on both pages. 

Have a look at these groups and pages, and find other skullies just like you! You might even see the occasional post from me!! Bone man out!

Skull Emporium

www.skullemporium.com.au

https://www.facebook.com/SkullEmporium/

https://www.instagram.com/skullemporium/

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1557620361214825/?ref=bookmarks

The Diary of Bone Jangles: In Which....SHE SAYS YES!!

The sweet sound of bells will soon be heard! The engagement I so wished for is here!

Oh my chums!! I am the happiest dead man alive! This past week I proposed to my beloved Ghoulia. I wanted to make it special for her, so I booked us a table at a very exclusive restaurant (you need to be dead for at least 200  years to get in! Luckily I've been dead for far longer than that!). I picked her up for our date, presenting her with a bouquet of the finest black roses available. Ghoulia loved them but they made her sneeze quite a bit. This of course made me nervous; how many other things could go wrong?

I should not have asked that question! After leaving the Skull Emporium shop, we arrived at the restaurant 20 minutes late for our reservation. The GPS (which my shop keep tells me helps you to drive to your location, however did not make one effort to reach the pedals for me at all!) took us around every backstreet possible! We finally arrived and were seated by the most lovely gargoyle, who explained she was to be our waitress for the evening. 

It was only after ordering the garlic bread entree that I remembered my poor darling is gluten intolerant! I was so flustered I forgot that important detail! At least I managed to order the correct drinks!

I waited until the waitress had brought our drinks and left, and decided the moment was now. I put the ring box on the table in front of Ghoulia (dead people don't get down on one knee, we may not get back up again!). I looked her in her magnificent eye sockets, and asked her to be my immortal companion, my beloved sidekick, my cherished wife. And she said.......

YES!

There are no words to describe how wonderful I feel! I was so excited I reached across the table to take her hand...and knocked everything off the table! Both of us were too excited to eat, so we left early (after much apologies) and took a walk along the riverside. I have never felt so loved and cherished as I did in that moment. To think such a smart, creative, kind and generous person could love me so much is amazing!

Back at home, Ghoulia wanted to start looking up wedding needs straight away. I happily joined her in her search. We found a wedding planner named Harridan, she seems nice! We also found a most wonderful wedding celebrant named Caroline Jackson! We found her on her Facebook page, and will be contacting her soon to book in time to talk about our upcoming wedding. My I like saying that! My UPCOMING WEDDING!

Caroline Jackson (Image sourced from C.Jackson Facebook Page)

Caroline was further recommended to us, as our shop keep's wedding was performed by her. I have seen the video of that beautiful ceremony, and both Ghoulia and I hope to have her perform ours!

As I write this diary entry, I cannot help but once again express how much joy my dear Ghoulia has brought to my life. I feel a better man beside her. I truly hope that you my chums, cherish the loved ones in your life. Partners, family, friends, they are what make us better people! Till next time skullies! The Bone Man is out!

In Which Shimmer Goes to the Vet

My dearest chums! Thank you for all your advice on proposing to Ghoulia. I took Davyd's advice, and have bought a ring made out of possum bone, with a rather large ruby (those of us who invested in car companies when the automobile was invented are quite well off now...). I will let you all know what she says, I can hardly contain myself!

The process of rehabilitating Minion is taking longer than expected. He is fully convinced of his Master's superiority. We do have glimmers of hope though! Ghoulia, who is the most patient dead girl I have ever met, is making good progress teaching him right from wrong. We may even start introducing him to new friends soon.

Today's diary entry regards the dear little cat I gifted my Ghoulia with. Shimmer is sick! For the past few days Shimmer has been lethargic, and her breathing has become wheezy. Off to the vet!

Ghoulia came with me, as she is very attached to Shimmer. We took her to a veterinary clinic that specializes in undead creatures. The veterinarian we saw was very helpful and kind. Shimmer received a full examination, though I will never understand how! She ran all over the counters, up-ended the pen container on the poor vet's desk, and even managed to get stuck between two cupboards! 

The lovely vet advised us Shimmer was simply suffering from grave worms. If left untreated it can cause major health issues in ghost animals. A simple course of medication was prescribed, and we were on the road back to the shop! Shimmer is still sick, but coming along in leaps and bounds...literally!

Till next time chums! Bone man out!

Attack on the Creepy Acre Woods

 

 

 

Chums! The time has come to put an end to Peter Scaringtale's influence in this area! Normally I am a placid man, but this cretin has got my bones in an uproar!

I assembled three of my posse, gathered as many afterlife bombs as I could, and attacked the plant!

 

 

 

 

My warriors assembled! I made my beloved Ghoulia stay behind, she is too sweet and too loving to be involved in an attack like this!

We entered the forest, and crept as quietly as we good, keeping on the look out for Fritz and Minion. Those two would rat us out in a heart beat and all would be lost!

We finally found the soul processing station in the darkest part of the forest. We attacked!!

 

 

 

 

We fought bravely, the afterlife bombs let off flames of orange ice, destroying the soul processing station!

 

 

 

 

We even managed to capture Minion! The girls did wonderfully! Fritz escaped, who knows where that dastardly fox is now?

We searched high and low, but could not find Peter Scaringtale! I fear for the boys and girls in other parts of the world, but I can sleep soundly knowing at the very least, this neck of the woods is now free from the control of that Easter hating bunny!

 

Till next time chums!

The Bone Man is out!